


Keeping Secrets

by shadowsamurai



Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan)
Genre: Angst, Friendship, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-12
Updated: 2012-06-12
Packaged: 2017-11-07 14:33:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/432205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shadowsamurai/pseuds/shadowsamurai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They have kept so many secrets so far, what's one more?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Keeping Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> Post-TDK.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, I'm just borrowing things for a while and I promise I'll put everything back exactly how I found it when I've finished. Well, almost exactly how I found it. ;)

NT-WtD-NT-WtD-NT-WtD

Alfred knows that Bruce is one of the most intelligent men on the planet; he should, he helped raise the boy until his parents died, and then took over completely. He had to, there was no one else. And now, he's Batman's sidekick in every respect except for going out and beating up the bad guys with Bruce. And he sees how Bruce handles all the situations, and how he handles being Bruce Wayne and Batman, two completely different characters, and Alfred knows Bruce is intelligent. But Bruce doesn't *see*, especially when it comes to people, especially those close to him. He couldn't see the truth about Rachel, and in all honesty, neither could Alfred. It was only after the letter she left for Bruce that the butler saw all the facts. Bruce couldn't see the truth about his parents, especially his father; the simple fact that Thomas Wayne was still only a man. A great man, no denying that, but just a man. And Bruce can't see the truth about Alfred.

And the truth is Alfred is tired. Not tired of helping Bruce, although some days he does think 'oh God, not again' and wonders why he insists on helping the young man destroy his life. No, Alfred is tired of hiding, tired of living a lie, of biting his tongue every other minute of every other day, just to keep the secret.

*"Very droll. Actually, it's Dent..."*

Those words almost made Alfred come undone. Even now, after everything that's happened, he can hear Bruce speaking to him, right before the television interrupted them. Alfred had made a comment about impressing Rachel, and Bruce had replied with those words.

*"Actually, it's Dent..."*

For a single heartbeat, Alfred thought Bruce was trying to impress Dent, and he was so relieved he forgot about being surprised by such a notion. Afterwards, Alfred knew he was stupid to have misread such a simple statement, and if he hadn't been so tired with keeping the secret, he wouldn't have even let the thought enter his head. Afterwards, when he thought about it properly, he realised what a foolish notion it had been. Afterwards, when he spoke with the secret, he knew the reason he was keeping it. The last thing Alfred wanted was for Bruce to feel like he was abandoning him. The young man might have been intelligent, might have been tough, might have even been Batman, but that didn't mean he wasn't vulnerable. Now, watching him, all Alfred can see is the young boy who watched his parents being murdered.

*"Actually, it's Dent..."*

Alfred would have been happier if that *had* been the case, not for his own selfish needs, but just because in the end, he saw Rachel was no good for Bruce. She promised him one thing, then said another. She had promised Bruce she would wait for him, that they would be together, then she turned around and agreed to marry Dent. But what really got to Alfred was the lack of understanding; Rachel had no idea what Bruce was giving up, what he would give up in the future. She assumed that he never had any intention of handing himself over; Alfred knew different. Even now, he knows different. No, he was very sorry she was dead, but Alfred felt it was for the best. Had she lived, had Bruce read that note...a vengeful Dark Knight wasn't something the butler felt he'd be able to deal with. And so, he had burnt the note and he would keep that secret along with his own.

Alfred shifts, his legs objecting to standing in one position for so long, and Coleman Reese's face pops into his head. Luckily, Alfred heard about his television appearance before it happened and had time to prepare for Bruce's reaction. Reese was another who just didn't understand the way of the world, and all those people who called for Batman's arrest just to satisfy some madman's whims. How easily the population turned on the one man who had given everything up for them. Alfred wanted to shout from the rooftops, to tell the world the truth, at times, but he wouldn't. Bruce's dual identity is yet another secret he keeps.

But the greatest one Alfred keeps is the one that will keep him awake for many more nights yet, and it isn't his own secret. No, it is actually the one about Bruce and Dent; the one where Bruce took responsibility for Dent's murder rather than let the White Knight's spotless reputation be tarnished. It was such a selfless act that Alfred felt tears pricking his eyes, and in that instant, he had never been more proud of Bruce. Ever. And for a while, he could allow the young to miss things about people; he could keep his own secret without complaining about being tired.

"He isn't going to disappear if you stop watching him, you know."

The tone is amused, the voice is smooth, and even if Alfred was deaf, he would recognise it. He doesn't even turn. "You know you shouldn't be here."

"That's a nice greeting," Lucius replies, peering over Alfred's shoulder.

Alfred closes his eyes. "I'm sorry, it's just..."

Lucius puts both hands on both shoulders and leans forward slightly, sending his calming influence into the butler's tense body. "I know and you don't have to apologise. We've had this conversation too many times already. I know why you do what you do, I only ask that when possible, you include me."

Alfred turns now, not surprised to find Lucius' face mere inches from his own. "You want to stand here all night watching Master Wayne sleep?" he asks, and it's his turn to be amused.

"With you? Sure. Why not?"

Alfred turns back, but leans his head to the left. Lucius leans to the right and the two of them meet in the middle, much like they've always done. Their arguments have been few and far between; the last one worth any mention was just before Bruce was poisoned with Crane's toxin. Alfred always wondered if Bruce had noticed the cold tone he used with Lucius that day, but considering the young man had only just woke up, probably not. And they had argued because Lucius was tired of keeping their secret, while Alfred had remained firm it had to stay a secret. He wasn't ashamed of their relationship, he never had been, and had Bruce not decided to try and save Gotham single-handedly, Alfred would have told him that for the better part of thirty years, he and Lucius had been inseparable because of the bond of love the two of them discovered existed between them. Neither had been looking for it, neither had expected it, but neither fought it. If it was meant to be, it was meant to be. And it was meant to be. Alfred's single biggest regret was his commitment to the Wayne family, a commitment that had and always would come first, a commitment that Lucius understood most of the time, but like any other rational human being, sometimes rebelled against.

No, Alfred's reason for wanting to keep their relationship a secret was the young man lying in the bed in front of them. The butler never wanted him to feel like he was alone, and even though the day would come when neither Alfred nor Lucius was around to support Bruce, until that day arrived, Alfred wanted him to have all the support he needed.

"He did it," Lucius says quietly. Alfred nods against the other man's head. Bruce saved Gotham, true, but the butler is afraid he's lost himself. Lucius senses this and squeezes his shoulders. "He'll get through this, Alfred. He's strong, and he's got the both of us. It'll hurt for a while, and I'd worry if it didn't, but he'll get through. As for Batman, he's too intelligent to be caught."

"I know all that, Lucius, but if I don't worry about him, who will?" Alfred asks, his hands coming up to grab the other man's, pulling his arms around him.

Lucius smiles. "Fair enough. You don't mind if I worry about you, then, do you? After all, someone has to and it might as well be me."

"As long as you do it quietly."

And so they stand in silence, their arms about each other, one drawing strength and comfort from the other, who gladly gives whatever he can to help the man he loves. They watch Bruce sleep fitfully, they can see him trying to get his battered body comfortable. Out of love for each other, Alfred and Lucius stay to take care of him, but each also stays out of love for Bruce. To Alfred, he's the son he never had. To Lucius, he's a man to look up to, to admire and to aspire to be like.

"We could tell him, you know," Lucius says quietly after a while.

Alfred sighs and frowns. "Not now, Lucius."

"I don't mean tomorrow, but soon. He's more open-minded that you give him credit for," he says. "And I think he'd like to know you're happy."

"I can't leave him," Alfred replies.

Lucius rolls his eyes. "I never asked you to, did I? I never have and I never will. You know that."

"I know, I just..."

Again, Lucius interrupts him. "I know. But at least consider it. With all these secrets being kept, someone's bound to break sooner or later."

"On that we can agree," Alfred says, then, after a pause, "I'll think about it."

"Good. Now come and have something to eat and a sit down. You're no good to Bruce dead on your feet," Lucius orders. "If you want, I'll watch him while you sleep."

"You don't..."

"I do. For you. And for him, but mainly for you."

Alfred turns fully and rests his forehead against Lucius'. "What did I do to deserve you?"

Lucius smiles. "Something very evil in a past life." He gives him a brief kiss. "Come on, to the kitchen with you."

In the bedroom, Bruce lies still until everything's gone quiet, until he *knows* Alfred isn't there any more. He's always been able to tell when the butler was watching him, he's developed a sixth sense for it. And now, safe in the knowledge he's alone, Bruce allows himself a smile. It's difficult after everything that's happened, but for Alfred's happiness, he can smile. Because Bruce isn't as blind as Alfred thinks, because he *is* that intelligent and that observant. Because he *has* noticed the looks between the butler and Lucius, the little touches when they think no one's watching. Bruce knows when they've had an argument or when Lucius has done something special for Alfred. Bruce has known about their relationship for years; after his parents died, but before he disappeared from Gotham for that long time. And Bruce *is* happy for Alfred, and for Lucius. And he knows the butler will never abandon him. He only wishes Alfred would heed Lucius' words and tell him. But Bruce knows that some secrets are difficult to voice, that some things work better as secrets.

And so as Alfred and Lucius keep so many secrets from him and for him, Bruce is happy to keep that small one of theirs.

FIN


End file.
